Stating the Obvious

It felt like Anna was taken aback by my response to a comment she made at our life coaching session, an almost throw-away description of one of my sibs. Maybe it showed on my face that with that one word, a key was turned in a long-sought, always just-out-of-sight lock on my awareness, letting out with an beyond measure WHOOOOOOSE!! of understanding/insight/compassion, the ultimate AH HA! moment of my life, to date.

"What did you just say?" I asked.

She repeated it.

"Where did you get that? How did you know?"

To Anna, she was stating what she thought was just restating the obvious & looked seriously startled and seemed taken totally off guard by my questions ~ "It's what you described."

And it was - but I hadn't realized it. >I'd< described it, without grasping what I'd described.

Oh, the wonders of a life coach - someone to hear what a person says & say it back, giving the words entire new power..

Surprise Gift

What a godsend! I knew in my bones that teaming up with Anna Friesen Cole would open the way to something. Little could I have guessed she'd rock my world in the most remarkable, unimaginably beyond-the-beyond ways possible!!!

Background:

THE great constant of my life, one that drove my sibs & Mom into the stratosphere of irked, was my unremitting attempt to figure out the gist of my family's core dynamics, because they never ever made sense to me.

Not as a little kid, not as a teen, not as a young adult, not as a grown up.

Wasn't after fault-finding or recriminations, just a core understanding of what felt to me like... to this day, I don't have the words to say how it felt. Not sure if there even IS a word, at least in the English language.

Thank goodness for getting older! And for Mom passing right before my 50th b-day. Age & no longer being !st & foremost a daughter (yep, even before wife) opened the way to cease & desist

my ceaselessly futile attempts at understanding my family's blatantly byzantine dynamics.

Walked away - well, that was my intent, if not always my reality.

The only thing all that storm & stress had yielded was more stormy stress. It took until the past couple years, but was finally able to SEE that and then let go of the related, suck-you-in & drag-you-down issues.

Which was when the Universe was finally free to give me the BEST surprise birthday present EVER - Anna & her almost freaky people-mapping insights! Seriously - our first coaching session was the day after my b-day!!!

Coincidence?

Mere happenstance?

I think NOT!

Thank you, Universe ~ and keep all those blessings coming!!!

Anna

Gee, talking about everything being in its place! What a blessing that Anna Friesen Cole & I connected just when we did - certainly no mere accident.

Never Saw This One Coming

Am continually surprised by how incredible, never-could-have-predicted-it things keep happening in my life.

Aside from some traditional goodies I already have in the baking pipe line for the college, today was my farewell to the traditional baked yummies that have been my stock in trade since I made my first batch of Krazy Krunch - for the 7th Grade Christmas party. And it was a great & glorious adieu, visually & gastronomically. Totally aced it - could feel the inspiration. Looked like a magazine spread!

If anyone had told me at this time last week that I'd be psyched about concentrating exclusively on HEALTHY baking... well, I just might have thought him or her utterly nuts. I really never saw it coming - and am I happy happy happy that it did!!

Healthier

I didn't make all wise food choices today, but I certainly made better ones!

Tweaking Lyris

How much of my breathing problems tie to the shadow on my lungs, how many relate to what I've done to my body?

The breezes at dawn have secrets to tell me. Don't go back to sleep.

I recite that first thing every morning. Hold onto it throughout the day. Be awake in each moment to what I'm doing, make sensible decisions within each moment that will benefit my long-term well being, get as fit as possible within each circumstance. Don't go back to sleep.

How better to sum up my current sense of myself, of my place within the structure of everything, than to tweak Miss Lyris' advice to my ANC freshman self ~ If I put as much time & effort into taking care of myself as I spend on others, I truly truly truly will go far.

I am Deev, and I've been saving all my best lines

for my 3rd act, for this moment forward.

Ever Hopeful!!

What dreadful disappointment - popped in the floppy discs that contain text of Mom's Mindwalker1910 musings & memories, and they were unreadable!!

Crushed!!!

Unless hopeful requests to two possible resources pan out, will be without the blessing of those last 18 months of Mom's time with us, when she spent many an hour in the computer studio with me, her dictating, me transcribing to keyboard. So many precious moments of musings & memories!!

Ever hopeful!!!